| FEELIN' GOOD! |
[Nov. 14th, 2005|12:51 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cheerful | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | down to nothing! | ] |
So Im in the library again during my lunch break to avoid smoking. Ive only had 2 smokes today, 1 yesterday. Im doing good with this whole quitting thing. okay not really so good but still, Im getting there! BAHAHAHAHAH MELISSA-ONE-X. So funny. Good times. This weekend was pretty chill. Friday show & hangouts. Saturday 2 shows. Sunday hangouts & parking lot MUD moshes for 3 hours. sweet. Today my shoulder muscles are killing though. We're so lame.
Saturday night when I spoke to Robby, for some reason i feel like we had such a good conversation. And ugh. Hearing him laugh, and being able to tell he was smiling as we spoke made me so happy. Honestly. That conversation made me so giddy. And last night. Oh god. It hit me so bad. I really love him so much, it's fucking intense. He makes me so happy. Ugh why in the world does he worry about losing me so much? It will honestly never happen. No matter how many new people I will meet/see it will always be him who is in my heart. Nobody could ever possibly take his place. I've never loved anyone the way that I love him. For real. I love him more than I loved Max, and that is an honest fact. Robby makes me happier than anyone I've ever been with. No joke. I'm smiling as I write this because it's nothing but truth. Godamn I miss him so much. NERD!!!!!!!!!
<r3 |
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| i have a reall bad habit of.. |
[Nov. 10th, 2005|12:53 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  aggravated | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | stand and fight | ] |
choosing my boyfriend over my friends.
i think i really need to cut that out, because last night i realized he just would not do the same for me. although he says he would, there is no meaning in those words. he knows that james and i are hating on eachother and he told me last night to deal with it because he was going to be hanging with james a lot when we move in together. which absolutly sucks because if him and one of my friends werent getting along then id be like 'sorry bro' to my friend and id keep my boy some company. all he could say was 'then we wont see eachother a lot'.
thaaaaaaaaaaanks best friend.. ugh.
anyways so last night i went to the mall with sarah and it was cool. she bought a magazing which had a full page for XLOOKING FORWARDX (my favorite band) and she gave it to me. we ran into holly, which was also cool cause she brought me to JD's hair salon so i could get some pointers and perhaps he could take me under his wing. at the moment i do cut and dye hair, but only from what i know. no one has really ever taught me anything about cutting or dying hair. i just do it on my own. it works out fine, of course, but it would be nice to have someone to guide me. once robby and i are living in oshawa i have to find a hair dressing school AND a piercing school. its gunna be intense. i have to save money for so much shit. ( apartment rent, go see robby funds, food, essential shit, schooling (hair dressing & piercing)) i would like to have some kind of budget so i can buy clothes every now and then. its gunna be tough. but i know we'll make it and get through it.
today during smoke breaks me, danielle, jessie, and SJ got SOAKED because we thought we were protected from the wind (we were outside) but turns out we were right behind some kind of water deposit and yeah we ended up getting water all over ourselves. it made my day but im quite sure we'll all end up sick.
i better get my period next weekend.
peace out. |
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| 3 monthssssssssssss |
[Nov. 9th, 2005|12:40 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  complete | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | circle takes the square | ] |
So it has officially been 3 months that Robby and I are dating.
I dont know why but Ive never been so excited for a 3 month anniversary before.
Perhaps because this is a long distance relationship and all who I know that have been in one havent lasted for any longer than 2 months.
Im so proud of us.
I truely love him with everything I have. I have never been so happy with someone before.
He makes me feel amazing no matter what the situation is.
I couldnt help but make a picture-ful entry. Weve got memories.
And hopefully many more to come. I love you baby, cant wait to hold you in my arms again.
P.S- I finished drawing out the chest piece for you. I love you boy.
"
Gravity doesn't grant me
the privilege of failure my bough never breaks
I don't stumble into anything
SO I CLIMB AND I CARVE OUR INITIALS INTO THE BARK
with that feather I found
but its all so contrived.
My genes didn't bless me
with the foresight of a sage
but I know how this will end,
in apologies and ink on the page.
A slowly constructed crow quilled confession
of my spirit to all of you,
black waterproof ink scars the board,
so hot-pressed, pristine and pure.
A slowly constructed manifestation of "to tremble",
as base as a bridge in a song
and less like the poem that I promised you.
Nothing's so lurid as haiku-detat
on sidewalks in white outlined chalk,
all I've got is this ink smeared lines.
"
 |
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| amazing mood |
[Nov. 8th, 2005|12:49 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  energetic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | make move | ] |
Well I'm at school now and it's shitty.
I'm in a good mood though. Although my friends did in fact ditch me so that they could go ruin themselves with their drugs, and poison themselves until you could literally see the blood in their eyes, I'm still in a rather good mood. Why, you ask?
Because Robby and I had a full day without fighting yesterday.
Yeah, you're thinking, WOW big deal, but him and I are constantly fighting. And it's always over little things. But yesterday was perfect. No fighting whatsoever.
I got a good 75 minutes of sleep during first period and I'm not even grumpy.
When things with me and Robby are good, then everything else is a breeze as well.
I miss him insanely though.
I CANT TAKE THIS, I CANT WAIT!
I need him here now.
I love Robby-Edward Hill, guys!
TOMORROW = 3 MONTHS!
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| so my dad.. |
[Oct. 28th, 2005|11:57 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  alone | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | none | ] |
likes breaking my fingers and dragging me up the stairs to throw me into my room. Then he says ''so you wanna run away with your fucking boyfriend, what did I ever do to you?''
whatever, long story short, my dads a fucking dumbass and he's so fucking blind and in denial, he needs to open up those brown eyes of him and see that HE'S the one tearing the family apart, not me. |
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| so i miss muh babbyyyyyy; |
[Oct. 26th, 2005|07:40 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | bitchy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | circle takes the square | ] |
Yeah well, Im definitly just killin' time with you losers until he gets here.
Yeah, thats what happens when you meet your other half.
Shit, get over yourselves. I'm NOT the FRIENDS&FAMILY FOR LYFE type of person, because both parties have stabbed me right in the back several times, so get over it, he makes me happy, and you just dont. |
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